You dont realize what you have, until its gone
by Jessicalove246
Summary: Kylie Gardner and Dick Grayson both lived in a orphanage. That is until Dick got adopted and Kylie ran away. All Kylie had left of Dick was a necklace. He was living the life she wanted. She didn't want to be living on the streets. Then, a masked man saved her. He gave her a purpose. She became a villain. And her job, to kill Robin. Little does she know...masks are deceiving.
1. Prologue

_**Disclaimer: I claim to own none of the original Teen Titans characters. However, all original characters were created by me.**_

******_Okayyy, this is the first story ive ever uploaded onto this site so please...bare with me! I have horrible punctuation if you cant tell;)))_**

**_Enjoy!_**

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**Prologue**

"What if we both get adopted." I asked Dick.

I placed my hands behind my head as a cushion instead of laying on the orphanage roof top. The moon lit up the night like a candle and the stars were like sparks bouncing off the flame.

"That would be...great." He answered, his voice quiet and distant.

"Well yeah, but...it also means that we wouldn't be able to see each other." I whispered.

I waited for his answer but when he didnt respond I turned my head to look at him. He was laying on his back looking at the night sky above. He turned his head to look at me and our eyes locked onto eachother. I raised my eyebrows in a way to ask 'what do you think'. But, instead of answering he sat up and sat criss cross applesauce.

"Turn around and close your eyes." He whispered.

I raised my eyebrows.

"Just do it."

"Okay..."

I do as he says.

Something light was placed around my neck.

"Okay, you can open your eyes." He said.

I open my eyes and look down to my neck. A shiny pendant lays around a thin chain. Its shaped as a person jumping through the air. I gasp as I recognized it. Quickly, I turned around and faced Robin.

"Im not taking this! This was your moms!" I yelled and reached to the back so I could take it off.

"No." He grabs my arms and returns them to my side. "Keep it, I have a matching one. As long as you have this, I will always be with you."

"Dick, this means a lot to you...it was your m-moms."

"Yeah, it does." He sighed. "But, you mean more to me."

Tears filedl my eyes.

"W-W-Why are you c-crying!?"

"Because." I wiped my eyes. "That was the nicest thing a-anyone..." I sniffed a little. "has ever said to me."

He gave me a huge smile and shook his head as if he was trying to stop himself from laughing. He laid back down on his back and I did the same. Next thing I knew, we both were asleep.

_**Morning... **_

I slowly opened my eyes and blinked as I tried to adjust them to the sun light. When everything became clear I looked around the roof top. But, I was the only one on it. Dick probably went to go take a shower or something. But, why would he not wake me up? I got up and walked over to the fire escape. When I finally walked down the stairs and climbed into the window of Dicks bedroom, I found his 3 roommates.

"Where's Dick?" I asked them.

They all looked at eachother, then back to me.

"Uhhh...Kylie...Dick got adopted." A boy named Andrew said.

"Yeah, by some rich guy." Another one added.

Wait, what? I turned around to look at Dicks bed. The pictures that were on his bedside table were gone and the plaid blanket he always used was folded away and tucked at the end of the bed. He...left. Slowly, my whole world shattered like a piece of glass. After my parents died I didn't have anything. No family, no friends and no that cared. But then Dick came to the orphanage. I finally had a reason to wake up every morning. I had something, _someone_ that I cared for. Someone that cared about _me_. Someone who I could always count on to be there for me. But now, I have _nothing_. In that moment, I realized something.

_I love Dick Grayson._

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_**So, this was when Dick was in the Catholic Orphanage. Then, he got adopted by Bruce Wayne. **_

_**Yeah, you probably figured that part out...and yes...I said criss cross applesauce because I forgot what its really called. **_

_**-Jess:)**_


	2. Chapter 1Masked

_**Disclaimer: I claim to own none of the original Teen Titans characters. However, all original characters were created by me.**_

_**Let me tell you one thing, I went through hell trying to figure out how to add a new chapter! To be honest, im only making it a document right now and I dont even know if I am doing it right. :P Whatever, lets hope.**_

_**K, you dont have to listen to me ramble on. Enjoy:)**_

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**Chapter 1~ Masked**

I walk the streets of...wait...what city am I in again? Oh yeah! Jump City. All the cops are after me because I ran away from the orphanage. I hated it there! It was hell! The kids were rude and loud. The adults only cared about themselves and they made me take care of the little rug rats. I dont like being a personal gymnasium for 5 year olds! My stomach growls and I groan as I walk past a pizzaria. I haven't ate in 2 days. Well, if you count a bag of chips then I ate a few hours ago. The moon stands high in the sky. Just a sliver of it shines as the rest is covered by a shadow. I continue to walk down the crowded streets not totally sure where I am going. I'll go wherever the world takes me I guess. I'll keep walking until I find a rabbit hole to fall into like Alice did.

"Hey sweetie." A deep voice says in my ear.

Shocked, I let out a small screech and turn around. Before my brain can catch up to reality a cold hand is placed over my mouth and I am roughly pulled backwards. There was no time for a reaction because it all happened so fast. I watch as the lights of the city disappear and I am dragged into a dark alley. The smell of alcohol and trash fills my nose. I try desperately to pry the hand off my mouth and I frail my legs trying to find something to hold onto. Then the person removes their hand. Dust flys around me as I am slammed onto the concrete. Slowly, the dust falls and 2 men appear in front of me. The shadow of the dark alley cover their faces and I am forced to stare at their worn down jeans. The only light is a small glimmer coming from a old lightbulb on the wall. Horrified, I crawl backwards but I come into contact with a pair legs.

"Help!" I scream at the top of my lungs.

A pain shoots through my stomach and blood shoots out of my mouth. A man, maybe 40, holds his foot against my stomach. I whimper in pain. He pulls out a shiny black object, a gun. The darkness hides their faces but I know mine is expressing the horror I am feeling right now.

"Scream and I shoot. Got it." His voice cold.

I nod my head and tears begin to rapidly fall down my face.

"Aww, shes crying." One of the men states, sarcasm and humor filling his voice.

The man holding the gun leans down to my level. He places a hand around my throat and pushes me against a wall. I stare in terror at his face. My whole body seemed consumed with fear. I couldn't think straight or even focus on what was occurring. His clearly unshaved face and ratty black hair. The smell of alcohol burns my nose as he leans closer to me. I stare into his green eyes. Just by looking into his eyes I can feel the pain he feels. Betrayal, Heartbreak, Death, Loneliness. Their the same things I have felt. For some reason, I open my mouth and a piercing scream flows out. Instantly I regret that. Then..the world seems to go into slow motion. The mans face becomes furious and hard. A loud noise rings in my ears and something wet forms onto my stomach. The man's eyes widen and he lets me go. He takes a few steps backward and hides into the shadows. I fall to my side, tears streaming down my face and a indescribable pain in my stomach. I can feel the blood pouring out of my body and mixing with the dusty concrete. All the sound from the city is blocked out and I can only hear their screaming.

"You idiot!"

"She screamed!"

"You werent suppose to shoot her!"

"Lets just go!"

I watch as the 3 mens figures disappear out of the alley. Am I really going to die_ here_? Its not like I ever had anything to_ live for._ Everything I ever cared about got_ ripped away_ from me. I have.._.nothing_. I guess, I never found my rabbit hole. The world begins to black out as my eyes are forced shut._ I guess I really am going to die._ The last thing I see, is a man with a black and orange mask on leaning down to me. Then, darkness.

**Later, sometime, somewhere**

I open my eyes slowly and blink as they adjust to the light of the room. Wait, room? I try to sit up but a pain in my stomach forces me to lay back down.

"You shouldnt move." A low voice says.

I turn my head to the voice and see the same masked man as when I past out.

"W-w-who a-are you?" I manage to ask through the pain.

"My name is Slade."

Maybe I just found my Rabbit hole.

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_**That was super short but its just to get the story **_MOVING.

**_Im super bad at describing how things are happening and i'm even worse at explaining how people feel. Thats why I use A LOT of dialogue. So, it was really hard for me to write this chapter thats why its all cheesy. _**

**_That probably didn't make any_**** sense...**_nevermind_

**_-Jess:) _**


	3. Chapter 2- Undercover

**____****Disclaimer: I claim to own none of the original Teen Titans characters. However, all original characters were created by me.**

**_ATTENTION: So, I changed this chapter because I didn't like the way the first one played out. It seemed really unrealistic and not relatable. Sorry if you already read this chapter Ill put the parts I changed in bold so you dont have to go searching for were it is. Ive read a lot of Teen Titans fan fictions about people going undercover like in this one. They rush things to much and it annoys the akljdfkal out of me. So, im trying my hardest to not do that in this chapter;/. _**

**_Time skip!_**

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**Chapter 2~ Undercover**

"Kylie, how come you always wear that necklace?" Slade asks.

I pull my face out the book I was drooling over. Gosh, sometimes I just want a life like the girl in my book. The only things she has to worry about are boys, grades, nails, clothes and more boys. I have to worry about being arrested every second. I have to keep my guard up every moment incase someone attacks me. I have to worry about running out of bullets or my bo staff breaking during a fight. Boys? Boys are on another planet for me. Well other than Red-X. But, I don't even know if he really is a boy or not...

"Kylie." Slade says again.

Blood starts rushing to my head from laying upside so I return to a upright position. I get off the leather couch and walk over to the many bookcases Slade has in his lair. Computers and other electronics line the walls. A brown leather couch sits in front of an ancient looking fireplace. Inside is a crackling fire. Across from the couch is a lounge chair that Slade likes to sit in and do 'paperwork'.

"A friend gave it to me." I finally answer as I return the book to the shelf.

"Yeah, but why. Ever since I met you 5 years ago, you've never taken it off."

I turn to look at him. Well, not him. His half black and half orange mask.

"How come you always wear that mask? Ever since you saved me 5 years ago, you've never taken it off." I counter.

"Wow, I did a pretty good job at training you." He mumbles, knowing I beat him.

I smirk and walk back over to the couch.

I sit down on the old leather and stare at him, "Its just one of those things. You know, like something you do to make yourself feel safe. I wear my necklace because it makes me feel safe, you wear your mask because it makes you feel safe knowing no one knows who you really are." He looks up from his book and narrows his eyes at me.

"Hmm, why does it make you feel safe." He asks, getting up.

I watch him as he walks over to his computer and sits down.

"Because, knowing you have a piece of someone...helps to ease the pain of losing them. Its like, I know they're always there." I shrug and stand up also.

"Your one wise kid." He mumbles.

"Hey, what did you need me for." A familiar raspy voice says behind me.

I turn around and come face to face with Red-X.

"You are going to help Kylie with something." Slade says, still looking at his computer.

"He is?" I ask.

"Yup, your going undercover as a Teen Titan."

"Excuse me?" I ask, totally lost.

**Later that night.**I watch patiently from the roof top as Red-X walks up to the jewelry store. I can see my reflection in the glass that makes up the walls. Although, it isnt really me. Slade gave me a necklace that changes the way I appear to others. I have a new face and a new name. A new life. Im not the Blonde haired, Green eyed, Kylie Gardner. I am a black haired browned, Hannah White. Right now we are staging a fake battle between Red and I. Red is going to try and steal from a jewelry store and I am going to stop him. Then, the Titans will see and make me a Teen Titan. Hopefully. And after they begin to trust me, I'll kill their leader. Which lets Slade take advantage of the rest of the teams confusion and mourning to follow through with his plans. Whatever they are. He wont tell me. Red punches the glass of the jewelry store and it shatters into pieces. Wow, Red...smoooooth. The alarm goes off echoing through the uninhabited streets. Your going to wake the hole town up! He walks inside and disappears into the shadows. I jump down from the roof I was hiding on and walk across the street to the jewelry store. I step on the shards of glass and lean against the broken door frame. I watch as Red tries desperately to shove as many diamonds in his bag as possible._  
_

"Your a really bad criminal. The first thing you do is set the alarm off. Like come on, WHO DOES THAT?!" I cross my arms and smirk at him.

He turns around and I can almost hear him laughing.

"What do you know about stealing things?" Sarcasm fills his voice.

"Ive stopped enough bad guys to know how to do it. But, its not like I ever would." I scoff and bite my lip to stop myself from laughing.

This whole Im-a-superhero-not-a-villian- act is quite fun. Police sirens ring in the distance and Red stiffens. I lunge toward him and slam him into the wall. I punch his face but he moves it to the side causing me to punch the wall instead. He knees me in the stomach and pushes me back. I clutch onto my stomach and try to take in a breath to fill my empty lungs. He runs back out the shattered doorway.

"Oh, your not getting away." I shout and chase after him.

He begins to run down the sidewalk and I continue running after him. I take out a throwing knife and aim it for his shoulder. I release the knife and it flies into Red causing him to fall to the floor. As I run up to him he yanks the knife out of him and tosses it into the street. Knowing he can get away he stands up in a fighting stance. He punches me in the jaw and I kick him in the thigh. The sirens grow louder and I can see the red and blue lights flashing around us. I yank the bag of diamonds off his belt buckle and toss them aside. He tries to shoot a X at me but I dodge it and the X hits a telephone pole.

"Red-X your not getting away this time!" A voice shouts from behind me.

The Teen Titans. And thats Reds cue to leave. Red tries to punch me again but I stop it with my hand. I slowly tighten my fist and he tries to yank it away but I keep a firm hold of it.

"Sorry Titans, this girl beat you to it. Shes more of a challenge than any of you!" Red laughs.

He presses the button on his belt and I watch as his body disintegrates away.

"Woah, who the hell are you?" One of the Titans ask.

I turn around and face them the 5 of them.

"Hannah." I simply reply to whoever asked.

The 5 stare at me blankly. Cyborg, the half robot half human. Beast Boy, the green animal shifter. Raven, the telekinesis user. Starfire, the alien with super strength and star bolts. Then Robin, the superhuman with no superpowers. Kinda like me.

"Hellooo," The green one says in a what he may think is a seductive tone. "Im Beast Boy."

"Hannah." I say again.

"This is Cyborg, Raven, Starfire and Robin." He points to each one.

"Hi." I try to force a smile.

**"Ive never seen you before. Are you from around here?" Robin asks.**

**"No."**

**"Well little lady," Cyborg says looking around him. "what was it that Red stole this time?"**

**I point to the black bag laying in the street. "Those diamonds."**

**Cyborg nods and walks over to return the diamonds.**

**"Robin, its almost morning. Lets go eat breakfast!" Beast boy shouts and turns into a green puppy.**

**He stands in front of Robin and wines.**

**Cyborg comes back over, "Im up for some waffles!"**

**Starfire twirls in the air, "That would be wonderful!"**

**Raven stares blankly at all of them. She doesnt seem like the kind to be very...social.**

**"Okay, okay." Robin agrees. "Hannah, do you wanna come? It will be our treat since you stopped Red-X."**

**"Really?" I ask a little surprised that they invited me.**

**Beast boy morphs back into a human. "Yeah Hannah, come on!" He takes my hand and pulls me down the side walk toward a waffle house. "Its not like its far!"**

**"Beast boy, wait up!"**

**Inside the Waffle House**

**I sit down between Robin and Cyborg in the small booth. Raven, Beast Boy and Starfire sit on the other half of the booth. I suddenly become uncomfortable. Im not good at these sorts of things. I never really had very many friends. Well, I really only had one...and look that turned out. I guess all I can do is try to be social like the girl in my book.  
**

**"Hannah, where is it you are from?" Starfire asks.**

**"Oh..." Should I be honest? Would it really matter anymore? "I was born in a big city but when I was raised in a orphanage since I was 9."**

**Instantly, Robins body tenses up. I can feel him stiffen against my side and shift in his seat.**

**"Oh, what is a orphanage?" She looks around to her friends.**

**"Its where people go when they dont have parents." Raven says quietly, as if she doesnt want me to hear.**

**The uncomfortable feeling I had a second ago becomes stronger. I feel all their eyes on me and I shift nervously in my seat**

**Starfire looks down to her lap. "You do not have parents."**

**I sigh and stare down to the menu in front of me.**

**"Starfire, stop." Robin orders.**

**"Did I say something wrong?"**

**"No, just stop talking about it."**

**"Okay, I apologize Robin."**

**I know that Starfire isn't from our planet, but I dont want to get into this. I dont like to discuss my parents or the orphanage. "Its okay."**

**Its silent for a moment as everyone looks over their menus. The waffle house is completely deserted, other than the waitress who looks to be half asleep. The first on to break the silence is Cyborg.**

**"Alrighty waiter, im ready for some waffles!" He yells to the women behind the counter.**

**"Alright." She walks over to us with a pen and pad. "What else can I get you guys."**

**A feeling of comfort waves over me. I've never felt safe and secure like this other than the times I was with Dick. The Titans seem so open and honest. Their like a breath of fresh air!**

**"Raven and I shall have the number 4." Starfire tells the women.**

**She writes it down on her small notepad and then looks to Beast Boy.**

**"A stack of pancakes, please!"**

**Robin orders a Sausage patty and I order a small bowl of hash browns.**

**"Hannah, how come you're in Jump City?" Robin questions.**

**I bite on my lip and summon up lies. "I was looking for a place to stay...u-until my a-aunt got back from a...b-business trip in a few weeks." Damn, im good.**

**"Oh, you should stay in Titans with us until then!" Cyborg shouts, Beast Boy and Starfire frantically nod their heads. "Is that alright with you two?" He asks Robin and Raven.**

**"I could care less." Raven groans.**

**"Yeah, she can stay in the guest room." Robin agrees.**

**This is too easy.**

**Back at the tower**

**"You can sleep in this room." Robin opens the Inside is a basic room. A queen sized bed and brown sheets. A white chest and dresser sit against the wall. A flat screen hangs above the chest and a door to what I assume is a bathroom is next to it. Then, theres a large window with a break taking view of the ocean, the sun slowly peaks over the water.**

**I turn to him and smile. "Thanks."**

**"Your welcome. Do you need anything else?" He asks.**

**I shake my head. This is crazy. My heartbeat quickens and I search his face for amusement. Why would they let someone stay with them after a second of knowing them? Does he know? Is the necklace not working? "Are you sure that this is alright, I mean you don't mind?"**

**"No! Your a Teen Titan now!"**

**"Alright then." I step into the room and turn around to press the button so the door will close.**

**"Goodnight, well good morning." He points to the sun that is slowly rising.**

**"You too." I shut the door and fall against the wall**

**"That was intense." I whisper to myself.**

**I take out my phone and send a text to Slades computers. Since hes to old to have a cell phone.**

**Okay, im in the house. They are letting me stay with them while 'my aunt is away on a business trip.' Im coming by in a little to pack a bag of clothes. I told them I was staying in a motel for the night so they dont suspect anything.**

**I toss the phone onto the bed and walk over to the window. I watch as the waves crash against each other and race to the shore.**

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_**Thanks for reading!**_

_**-Jess:)**_


	4. Chapter 3- Rules, Laws and Regulations

**_Disclaimer: I do not own the characters of Teen Titans but the characters that were created by me are mine_**

**_Hi;)_**

**_Wanna hear a story?_**

**_No?_**

**_Too bad-_-_**

**_I forgot the username to my account!_**

**_Yeah, usually people forget the password but-NOPE NOT ME!_**

**_I forget the username._**

**_Now, why didnt I just log into my email and recover it or whatever._**

**_Because._**

**_I forgot the password to my email:)_**

**_Yeah, I know! Im a idiot:[_**

**_Anyway to the story:)_**

* * *

**Chapter 3- Rules, Laws and Regulations**

I toss random article of clothing toward the area of my bed wear my suitcase lays. I constantly rummage through my dresser drawers unable to find anything to wear. Yet, there are so many things in front of me. Its as if all my clothes are hiding in plain site. Slade stands leaning against the door frame of my room, watching me. Frustrated with my lack of ability to find my pajama pants I slam the dresser drawer shut.

"Packing is hard! Im not even going anywhere, just a few blocks down the road! Is this necessary!?" I groan and stare at the masked man.

"Yes, you have to be believable." He crosses his arms. "That means you have to hurry up and get back to the tower before the Titans start becoming suspicious. Didn't you say you would be back by lunch?"

"Yeah, yeah! Dont rush me." I grumble and walk over to my clothes that were poorly thrown into my suitcase.

At Titans Tower

The elevator door opens revealing the large living room. The Titans, which are all sit on the semi circle couch, turn their heads around and lock gazes with me.

Beast Boy jumps from the couch and squeals, "Yay, now we can eat breakfast!"

"Its actually lunch." Raven retorts.

"Would it not be breakfast, we have just woken up?" Starfire ask.

"Yeah!" Bb exclaims.

"Breakfast...lunch doesnt matter. Why did you wait for me to eat?" I question them all.

Cyborg smiles and walks over to a large stack of waffles in the kitchen. "Robin wanted us to wait for you. Now! Who wants waffles!?"

I drag my gaze to Robin who is casually scratching the back of his neck. Obviously embarrassed. I can feel the blood rushing to my cheeks. Suddenly a wave of...deja vu comes over me as I stare at Robin.

_Flashblack~_

_"Come on, Dick! Lets just eat the pizza already!"_

_"Yeah, why do we have to wait for your girlfriend?"_

_"If we dont wait for her that means more for us!"_

_Dicks roommates continued to complain endlessly as they reached for the box of pizza. The roommates recently had saved up money on hoping to buy a actual dinner for themselves, and not be forced to eat the slump the orphanage feeds you. They all sat in the middle of their room surrounding the pizza box._

_"No! We have to wait for Kylie! She's finishing up her chores now and should be here any second! And shes NOT my girlfriend!" Dick announced fairly angry with the roomates._

_The kids were never very kind to Dick. They liked to pick on him a lot but it never really got to Dick because Kylie always made him feel better._

_"Oh come on, Dick!"_

_"Yeah, your such a party pooper!"_

_The door to the room opened slowly and a blonde haired girl peeked her head in. The girls eyes then locked onto Dicks blue ones._

_"Alright, now we can eat!" The roommates proclaimed and practically tore open the pizza box._

_The blonde haired girl took a seat next to Dick and they watched as the kids scarfed down the pizza like it could bring world peace._

_"Why did wait for me?" The girl asked Dick, a faint glow forming on her cheeks._

_Dick scratches his head and looks away in attempt to hide his blush._

_"Dick, Kylie...do you have any money to left?"_

_"Wh-YOU ATE IT!?"_

_Flashback over~_

Quickly, I push that memory aside. I can't let those feelings take over. I have to stay into character!

_**A**_**fter a silent breakfast **

"I wanna thank you guys again for letting me stay here while my Aunt is away." I force the kindest most non villain looking smile possible.

For some reason, I have this feeling in the pit of my stomach. Its not strong, but its not weak either. Its just a disturbance. What is it?

"Our pleasure. I mean you did stop Red-X for us." Cyborg states.

Raven and Starfire take the dirty dishes off the counter and into the kitchen to be washed.

"Are you sure you dont want any help with those?" I offer.

"Oh no! You are our guest!" Starfire says.

I have no intention on actually helping them. I dont want to help them and I wouldn't offer. Cyborg and Beast Boy get up from the table and immediately head for the large tv screen. Leaving me and Robin alone at the dining table.

"So, is this what you guys usually do?" I ask, turning to Robin.

"Yeah, we just hang out around here, train, fight crime. Its the pretty nonchalant."

"Seems nice." I mumble under my breath.

Oh, what I would give for my life to be this simple. But theres something about being a villain. When you are a villain, there aren't any rules. Theres no one to stop you from doing what you want. You cant be forced and told what to do. Rules are what cause you pain. Rules are what restricts you from your happiness. They take the things that are important to you away.

Rules...Laws...Regulations.

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_**"Its over already?"**_

_**I know, dont me\(x.x)/**_

_**I will go into more depth with the 'rules' in the next chapters. Basically as cheesy as it may sound, it will make sense. (I swear...okay, I hope)**_

_**-Jess:)**_


End file.
